Funnu tumbles out of the shell and is exposed to a myriad of new conditions. The darkness phases away into a dull orange (as light struck his closed eyes); the cramped room inside the shell broke into a comfortable nest; the initial chill blocked by his parents warm feathers. All these new conditions made him fairly excited.

He is feeling excited for the first time in his life (finally something new other than the mundane shell life), and he knows not what to do of it. It is a new and strange feeling to him, he is in so much space for the first time; he starts to move all his limbs, which seems to vent some of his excitement. And now he starts to shout out of excitement, as if to mark his arrival into the world. It feels good and he keeps on shouting.

Moments later Funnu sleeps off all the shouting and moving around. This was indeed the most arduous physical activity he had ever done. While all the excitement has exhausted Funnu into a sleep, I feel reasonably excited as well. By now I have figured out that Funnu is a bird, of what kind can only be found when the eyes are open.

Birds are impulsive creature’s driven by their conscious. Although only time will tell if Funnu will listen to me as well, but it will be better than being with a human. The most horrible part with humans being that grown ups actually teach the young ones to trust some norms humans have devised more than their conscious. Leaving that behind me, I look forward to flying with Funnu.

While I look into my hindsight, Funnu wakes up to some music. For him everything is new and this continues to excite him as well. And as he enjoys the music in his own way, I too enjoy listening to one of my favorites after a long time….

P.S. : Original photograph by Kamal Kishore Rana, published here by his permission (click here to see the original image)

Song which wakes Funnu: Free Bird by Lynyrd Skynyrd (Youtube search)

]]> http://foniars.com/2009/12/chapter-2-the-realization/feed/ 1 http://foniars.com/2009/12/chapter-1-the-birth/ http://foniars.com/2009/12/chapter-1-the-birth/#comments Fri, 18 Dec 2009 16:17:41 +0000 funnu http://foniars.com/?p=205 It is dark, it has always been dark. But it is not this darkness that bother’s him; no, it has never been the darkness. It is the surface, which strangle’s him…. for space…. for freedom. On this surface he once sat, stood, jumped and no matter what he did, it never seemed to run out. [...]]]>

It is dark, it has always been dark. But it is not this darkness that bother’s him; no, it has never been the darkness. It is the surface, which strangle’s him…. for space…. for freedom. On this surface he once sat, stood, jumped and no matter what he did, it never seemed to run out. But gradually over time, he felt that a shell was encroaching upon him; encapsulating him within. Nevertheless, the truth could not have been more different.

In reality this shell has always existed, it is only now he senses the presence; when he has grown into the space only to collide against the walls of the shell that contained him. These walls covered him from every side, and now he has grown into every angstrom of the space provided within. But the walls were only doing what they know how to do, protect him. And they knew only one way of doing it, don’t let anything inside.

When he was conceived, he was infinitesimally smaller than what he is now. It seemed improbable that one day, he will grow into this space. And yet the conceiver’s hoped for that day, and I knew that it would come. And now, when the moment has arrived, the purpose of this shell is fulfilled. They have done what they were meant to do with all the sincerity and must now give way to life. He must now break them, in order to fulfill his destiny, to live. And it is now that he will learn his first lesson in life.

When the time comes, we know what we are supposed to do, but do we do it? The only person standing in his way is that person himself. The time has come, when he has to break this shell. It has gotten extremely uncomfortable now; now when there is no space. I tell him, go on, this is what you are destined for; and he listens to me for the first time. He summons all his energy, and pushes with all what he has got. Nothing much happens, but he keeps trying when finally a crack appears; for the first time in his life light appears in front of him. But he cannot see it, for his eyes are closed. He can only feel it. Now, encouraged he pushes harder when he comes out of the shell. And it is now that Funnu is born….

P.S. :Original photo by Kamal Kishore Rana, published here by his permission (Click to see the original image)

But in this process there are certain things which I saw, experienced and liked. So the needs of Rajiv Fonia remained same but my needs increased as time passed. It has been directly proportionate to the amount of time I live. I do not know whether this relationship will remain as it is; but for as long as I have lived the needs are increasing. Although the goal of my existence was to fulfill the needs of Rajiv Fonia; seeing that it is easily accomplished my mind craved to do stuff which happened around me. And after realizing that the needs of Rajiv Fonia can be fulfilled in a time less than what is allocated to me; I tend to utilize that time to fulfill my own plans. Rajiv and I have come to terms on this topic; he utilizes this time by sleeping when I am not in a mood for doing anything, otherwise I use for the fulfilling the plans I have made.

Plan number one: Make a movie; this has been my dream since I started watching movies. Whenever I watched a movie I used to think that if a particular scene was filmed in some other way the scene would have been much better. Or if the end of the story was shown first and the beginning at the end then the movie would have been more gripping. But one needs so many people in order to make a movie. To start off with, we need people to act; and then there are the musicians and so many more people.

Till now in order to fulfill this plan I have taken up all the opportunities I had; I have made five videos, all five minute long. First one is called ‘finally final’; it was a music video which me and my friends made in our final year of engineering. Rather than writing more about it, I will just put the link up so that you can see it.

The original idea of the song belongs to Jai Shankar Beban(lyrics + guitar); and this song would not have been possible without Sharad(vocals), Pulkit(vocals + flute), Dodo(drums), Dhaneel(tabla). You can see my photo when the credits called director roll along with the photo.

After that I have made four videos during my first year at the mba, two out of which have been shared on you tube and I will put the links for that up as well. I have contributed in the editing of one of the videos (mile sur).

and

I would have loved to show you the other two as well; but they haven’t been uploaded on youtube.

Plan number 2: Write a novel; I don’t know why I had this idea in my mind. Because unlike the movies idea; which I got by getting inspired from watching a lot of movies; I haven’t read many novels. Infact I just read 2 novels completely. I think this is because I want to tell a story and making a movie is so time consuming and resource exhaustive that some day it came to my mind that I should start writing first.

So I have decided that year 2008 will be the reading year. I am presently reading ‘the curious incident of the dog in the night-time’. After which I am going to read ‘interpreter of maladies’. The dog one is a nice novel; you should read it.

Also Saurabh and I have decided that we will read a novel every week and write reviews so that we can improve our writing style. Although Nehte (Saurabh) has read loads of novels and stories; and his writing skills are way better than mine. So I will be learning alot from him.

Plan number 3: Work/Venture; This is a topic I am really confused about. Whether I should work or whether I should start some venture. The more I think the more I get confused, and the more the ideas that I get. I somewhat feel stupid not to think of simple ideas that others have thought I couldn’t which were a hit and more stupid when the ideas I thought were implemented and are very successful. I couldn’t implement them due to lack of resources.

I have come to the conclusion that I will start something that requires no resources at all and if it is a success then leverage over that to implement my other plans or think of some other resource less plan. And work simultaneously.

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I think these are all the plans I have. More on this later.